The fifth donkey-man of the perpetually unpleasant....
I am the bringer of chaos, destruction and general higgledy-piggledy to all who know me. All forms of human grace has left me and I fear to merely walk to the ladies room for I shall surely cause mass injuries to myself and to others. I fell in the parking lot at the beginning of class. Not just an ‘oops’ and stumble. I mean a full on swan dive with all implements of personal property flung to the heavens to rain back down upon me like fluffy snowflakes. Books do not rain down upon you like fluffy snowflakes. They hit you smack in the face and nose. My tampons, however, did cascade down upon ground, on the heads and at the feet of every male person within a 30 miles radius. I should have know that I shouldn’t be touching anything after yesterday. I innocently went to wind Nat’s grandfather clock, when the pendulum came off with a resounding clang. Oh. My. God. Not. The. Clock. Nottheclock. Nottheclock. Notthclocknottheclocknottheclock….. Yep. The CLOCK. Sh*t. All I could do is sit justifiably guilty clutching the pendulum like a severed limb of a loved one, praying to the clock gods until Nat finished her business and came back out of her study to find out what the noise was. She was calm. I was not. I burst into tears and babbled at her. She patted my head and then turned to the business of trying to get the damn thing back on. Nope. Pendulums are stubborn creatures that must go in little craggy places out of reach, not to mention you practically have to climb in the clock to get to the little craggy places too near precious things like gears and other workings. Please dear god let there be a clock maker out there that makes house calls and is relatively in the catastrophe budget. *sigh*

Ooooo, tampons are sneaky little creatures, aren't they? One was the cause of hilarity at work not long ago. During a quiet moment, when I gave up trying to make conversation with my patient's strung out Dad and decided to clear out my bulging pencil case. Carefully, I emptied the contents onto my workstation and began to sift through the pens, calculator, BP tourniquets, Frank Shann Drug Doses, pay slips, phone numbers, painkillers, chewing gum and, yes, the lone tampon that rolled ceremoniously of the workstation, hit the floor and kept rolling until it pitched up at the feet of the taciturn Dad. Several pairs of hushed eyes watched it go, my face getting redder and redder,until the Dad burst into hysterical laughter and my head sank onto my arms.......... :blush2:

great stories Mim. Happens to all of us! So class? Back in school? Mazel Tov!