On the subject of Valentine's Day
Did you think you could escape a holiday like Valentine's Day without a Mim's Musing? Ha! Ah...Valentine's Day. I never really liked this day even when I did have someone to share it with. It was the first holiday to become blatantly commericalized, not to mention unimaginative. I'm sorry not all of us like red roses. They are over bred and die in two days. If I want chocolate, I got out and GET chocolate. Anyway.... Valentine's Day Which has become more and more like a Eddie Izzard skit. Much like his take on Original Sin. Coming up with an Original Sin. How hellish is that? To come up with a sin that no one has ever done or heard of before: "Bless me father for I have sinned....I....poked a badger with a spoon." "...Well I've never heard that one before. One Hail Mary and Two Hello Dollies'...next please." "Bless me father for I have sinned...I...committed adultery." "TSK. HEEEEAAAARRRRD IT. Come back when you have an ORIGINAL SIN." Of course I cannot do this comedic master justice. If you are unfamilar you just must rush out and rent Eddie Izzard: Dressed to Kill. So for weeks now, we mere mortals have scoured the globe and the internet in search of ways to seduce, woo and carbonate hormones that no one has done or dared before. Feats of romance and love that will forever be glorified in Ambient Pentameter blogs for centuries. However, after 5,000 years of woo-age, Romantic notions are few on the ground, but condom and vigara sales are up so that must mean the human race is still trying. personally, I don't think this day is worth the stress and melt down. Because heaven forbid the night not go off as planned or with out the bang it was intended. Case in point: Valentine's dinner with Tim. Whom knew I hadn't been to a broadway play and and we had talked about it for about two weeks. He told me to dress up and when I saw the city come ever closer, I thought that we were going in to see Phantom. Wrong. A left turn took up to the Meadowlands where we had dinner at the race track. He spent a collective 5 mins with me in the 2.5 hour span as he was busy betting on horses. He said this was the ultimate date. (i.e. to show me that he was a classy, maffia-type with money). That goes second to the romantic weekend I had planned at a hotel with candles in the bathroom for romantic shower or bath purposes to which I had to use myself (alone) as he was busy watching wrestling in his tightie-whities and socks after 15 mins of f**k time. Valentine's Dinner with Mike N.: He didn't work that day and I had a 13 hour shift at the club and the car wash to where I had to arrive at his house cold, wet, bedraggled and exhausted to shower and change into an alluring female bedecked in dress, jewelry and perfume, although he had mentioned how good I smelled as I was. I informed him that what he was smelling was the liquid cherry scented car wax we use on the cars at the time. I smelled like a car. That did it for him. The evening really wasn't his fault, but it would have been prudent to ask me if A) I liked boats. B) Got seasick. C) Could manage seasickness enough to have a heavy five course dinner on board a boat touring Manhattan Island for 3 hours. However, he did not and he was in high dudgeon and 'humphed' about for the 2 hour drive home and rest of the evening since I failed to sufficiently appreciate his romantic evening as he stopped along the route home in order for me to throw up. It took two days for my stomach to settle. One Best Present award goes to Mike G. who made me cream cheese cookies shaped like hearts dipped on one side in dark chocolate and heart shaped sugar cookies with gobs of pink frosting. Both lovingly homemade with a handmade Valentine's card. Another goes out to Doktor X for my Puff-a-Lump..but I don't think that was a Valentine's day gift. What I miss about celebrating Valentine's Day? Making homemade valentine's cards out of paper dollies, construction paper and TONS of glitter. So, in short, I declare this day to now be called “Poke a Badger with a Spoon Day” So all you single people out there, go forth and try to come up with an original sin. :love2: :love: :devil

I knew I could count on you and your irony, Mim, to put a blatantly commercialized and unimaginative holiday like St. Valentine's in its proper light. :devil

I hold my hands up, Mim! I am an Eddie fan! I have loved his gentle, skew-whiff take on the world, long before The Riches, which haven't seen, for some reason.

You had me and a friend who came to visit in stitches. Very funny and very real.

Amen and I congratulate and salute you Mim!! I have felt for a long time that if one needs a day to remind them to show romance towards their better half - they have far more serious issues in the relationship than a $10 set of roses can cure! :applaud: :applaud: :applaud:

Right on, Gnat! :cool:

Just got to read your piece today,Mim, LOVED IT!!!!! :rotf: So funny... Love (and Valentine hugs! :hide ), Ship

Frances - is that for each flower or each dozen??? Because we've got $10 dozen roses at cheapie convenience stores. Lame!

Mind you, it serves the critters right for leaving it til the last minute anyway. don't you think? (says she, who is apparently getting her Valentine's Day gift this weekend, when the purveyor himself pitches up! :wink: )