Those were great Marian! :happy I loved them all. Thanks for sharing, I needed the laugh :mrgreen:

:applaud: another satisfied customer!! :mrgreen:

My sister who is an English language and literature professor sent me this one a while go... I hope you will like it Halt! This is the Grammar Police... Put down those words and step away from that sentence. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say, can and will be corrected and used against you in a court of language. You have the right to an editor. If you cannot acquire one, one will be appointed to you by the state of Eloquent Speech. If you do not understand the rights presented to you, an Ebonics translator will be provided, assuming one can be located.

It sounds like something my professor of English language and literature might have said. Pity that my professor and her colleagues of the English department at the university I attended applied this principle quite literally... there were students - and there still are, it seems - who had to take English language and literature exams 10 times before passing them...

I'm not sure most native English speakers in the U.S. could pass the tests you had to at your University unless they took it ten times.

I see what you mean, GG. Actually, I've seen some of the tests that people studying Italian as a foreign language have to take and I'm not sure I could pass them straightaway. However, I can recall a young woman who started attending university with me and finished two years later than me because she had to take English tests several times before passing them. Oh, well, professors told us to rest assured that at least half of us would never graduate end on the first day of courses.

Gaff - agreed! It kills me the emails I see at my work that get sent out by men and women who are not only older than me.......but make 10 times my salary and are higher up the corporate food chain. I look at these emails and I'm like "Are you kidding me???"

Wow! That's an incredible attrition rate and you passed the first round. No wonder you do so well communicating here. I admire that skill a lot. I wish I had studied more in French and Spanish classes, but I really wanted to take German. I've had a Hebrew class, but remember very little apart from a few songs. Actually I need to brush up on my sign language, two days ago a young deaf woman came through the store with her father and he told me she knows SEE sign which I studied many years ago. I signed a few things to her and she was so excited. Now I have to go back and remember my skills. Of course it is even harder for me to read it than sign. With SEE sign, the syntax is the same so it is just a matter of vocabulary.

Gnat, We must have posted at the same time. I've encountered the same thing in much of my career. Amazing how people can bluff their way through to a high rank depending on the skills of those below them.

I certainly should have kept up with the sign language better than I did. It takes a lot of practice and the times I used it; it was in a very simplistic form. Having teachers stay on top of us about practice is always a good thing. Wish I'd have realized that when I was younger.

Paul Newman Only women of a certain era will fully appreciate this true story. (if you don't understand this, tell your mother, she'll get it) (Now, that's not true! I get it too! Selma.) A Michigan woman and her family were vacationing in a small new England town where Paul Newman and his family often visited. One Sunday morning, the woman got up early to take a long walk. After a brisk five-mile hike, she decided to treat herself to a double-dip chocolate ice cream cone. She hopped in the car, drove to the center of the village and went straight to the combination bakery/ice cream parlor. There was only one other patron in the store. Paul Newman, siting at the counter having a dough nut and coffee. The woman's heart skipped a beat as her eyes made contact with those famous baby-blue eyes. The actor nodded graciously and the star struck woman smiled demurely. Pull yourself together! She chides herself. You're a happily married woman with three children, you're forty-five years old, not a teenager! The clerk filled her order and she took the double-dip chocolate ice cream cone in one hand and her change in the other. Then she went out the door, avoiding even a glance in Paul Newman's direction. When she reached her car, she realized that she had a handful of change but her other hand was empty. Where's my ice cream cone? Did I leave it in the store? Back into the shop she went, expecting to see the cone still in the clerk's hand or in a holder on the counter or something. No ice cream cone was in sight. With that, she happened to look over at Paul Newman. His face broke into his familiar warm friendly grin and he said to the woman, "You put it in your purse."

I enjoyed that one and I'll have to read it to my Mom and sisters, too.

:cool: Selma! Some people are just timeless and Paul newman is one of them.......I always wonder what Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid would have been like if they'd have gone with their original choice of Steve Mcqueen (who was tied up with The Reivers) instead of Robert Redford. I reckon the screen would have exploded with two pairs of eyes like that - look what happened in Towering Inferno! :wink:

I forgot all about The Reivers. I loved that movie. Wouldn't have minded seeing Steve McQueen as Sundance, but wouldn't have missed him in The Reivers either. Think of it McQueen could have been in The Sting, too.